Budget Day is finally here! Time to stop worrying and learn to love paying tax

I’ve never known such an agonising wait for a Budget. Like a trip to the dentist, I’ll be relieved to get it over with.

PM Keir Starmer and chancellor Rachel Reeves have made it clear they’re going to drill deep, and they won’t be giving us an anaesthetic.

They’re going after anybody who has accumulated a spot of wealth, which all too often is a codeword for pensioners.

The reason some “boomers” – to use another Labour buzzword – have more wealth isn’t because they’re rich or cosseted or grasping, but simply because they’re older.

They’ve had more time to build their savings or watch their home rise in value, and they shouldn’t be demonised for that. Yet they are.

Millions struggle in retirement, particularly those just above the threshold for claiming means-tested Pension Credit.

Reeves’ first major political act was to take their Winter Fuel Payment away. Heaven knows what she’s going after today.

One advantage to the extended Budget preamble is that it’s allowed time for Reeves to wake up to the fact that some of her planned tax hikes were plain daft.

She originally planned to lift capital gains tax (CGT) bands in line with income tax, after someone told her this would raise £15billion.

Then HMRC ran some actual figures and found it would actually cut the CGT take by £2 billion, as people clung onto capital gains rather than fill the Treasury’s coffers.

The downside of the delay is that it’s given Reeves more time to dream up tax hikes, without breaking Labour’s general election pledge to spare income tax, national insurance (NI) and VAT.

She’s preparing to slap national insurance on employers’ pension contributions, in a move she reckons could raise £20billion.

Labour furiously denies this will break its election pledge not to hike NI. But working people will foot the bill anyway, as employers cut future wage hikes to recoup the cost.

Reeves has also walked back on her pledge not to borrow more money. Now she’s going to add £57billion to the national debt, by fiddling the figures.

This is a huge gamble. If bond markets panic at the £300billion Labour is set to borrow this year, she could suffer her own Liz Truss moment.

Taxpayers have been taking evasive action, to see how they can escape what’s coming our way.

It’s probably too late now but for those who haven’t given up hope, I’ve run through a few last-minute steps pensioners might consider.

All most of us can do now is wait.

There’s a new stage show in London, a version of the classic Stanley Kubrick movie, Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb.

That title made me think of the Budget (everything makes me think of the Budget these days).

Labour’s tax bomb is hurtling towards us and all we can do is stop worrying about it and learn to love paying tax. We’ll pay an awful lot of it in the years to come, so we might as well see the funny side. Let’s just hope Reeves doesn’t blow up the economy, too.

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